He was always on the lookout for spies. At the time, Colorado Springs was a small city split between the Air Force and the New Age, and the latter, Pastor Ted believed, worked for the devil. Pastor Ted soon began upsetting the devil's plans. He staked out gay bars, inviting men to come to his church; his whole congregation pitched itself into invisible battles with demonic forces, sometimes in front of public buildings.Guess he got too close to some of those men and he got "infected" with gayness. The Xians are right to be afraid of the "gay agenda" -- spreading homosexuality in viral form is #1 on the 10-point list that they circulate around liberal circles. But hey, I guess you could believe, if you wanted to, that Pastor Haggard just called a gay prostitute for a massage (and meth). After all, most of you who could believe that also believe that Adam and Eve rode Jesus Ponies (aka "dinosaurs") around the Garden of Eden 6,000 years ago. So it shouldn't be hard for you.
I sure hope Mr. Bush didn't catch it:
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